I don't know about you but it's been where I have been residing lately and I don't like it. I am not fond because it takes over and wants ALL control over everything I really have no control over.
So I asked myself, why am I residing in this space, the danger space of the mind which is called the ego - self?
Is it control? Or is it desperation? Is it anger? Sadness? Is it fear of what could go wrong? Is it people will judge me? Is it not letting go of the past? Is it perfection? Is it fake or real?
All of these questions yet no direct, concrete answer.
The question isn't why am I in my head lately, the question is actually, why have I left my heart?
Truth be told, being in a heart space for me is scary, it's vulnerable actually. What does this even mean anyway?
Being in our heart space means choosing and acting and behaving from a place of love, from a place of ease, softness, from the feminine where there is flow and comfort with joy and belief and trust. This is a space where decisions should be easy and clear and where there is decisiveness and honor because we are honoring our body, heart and mind collectively.
It comes down to tuning in. Something again that I've neglected off and on over the years because I've been stuck in my tricky head space which leaves me in control of the outcome and not potentially at risk of it. Amazing isn't it?
Why would listening to our bodies be so damn hard though? Why for so long have I neglected what it's telling me?
Why on earth is this way even considered better or the norm?
Because of the hard-wiring, constant comfort we've lived in for decades now. Comfort is easier and it's safe. Comfort is not vulnerable, it's simple. Comfort is not growth, it's complacency.
In order to live in our essence, in our space, in our soul, in our intuitive intelligence, we must trust. I haven't trusted because I haven't surrendered to the control in which I think I have over my life. But truth be told, I have no control over it, the outcome of my life.
The only control I have is that of trusting the inner-self. I get to choose day after day the habits in which I form, the decisions in which I make and the direction in which I'm going. No one else is going to do that... but me.
I am un-wiring the fearful self to be a vulnerable one. Through my heart most importantly which will then tell my mind "it's safe here".
Day after day, night after night by choosing love over fear and by believing that the more I tune into the inner-being of my divine self... the more I get to embody exactly what I am on this planet to be.
A warrior. A lover.
Sending love & light & inner guidance to each of you on this beautiful late Spring day.