Un-busying our lives, one moment at a time.
I’m just going to come right out and say it – I don’t hate anything in life, apart from this over used, and oh so simple word… Busy.
I am so busy. How many times have you asked someone how they are doing and the response you hear is “I’m so busy” or “Life is busy” or “It’s busy”.
Too often, right?
Busy is not an emotion, it’s an adjective – so why are we glorifying the word busy?
There are many reasons actually; it may sound good, it keeps you preoccupied, it keeps you far away from the present moment, it may keep you sane, it keeps you engaged, it makes you feel important, it justifies what you’re ignoring, and it fuels your ego too.
I don’t know about you, but this was my way for many years, hustling around, trying to feel and be accomplished, trying to impress, trying to be wonder woman, trying to create a magical life, but through all of this – it derailed. The opposite happens when we are too busy being busy (or so we think).
We lose ourselves in the busy, in the hustle and in everyday grind, we forget the most important piece.
To be fulfilled in our own. And as a woman, one thing I know for sure is we so very often put everyone and everything else before ourselves. And still, we are the ones getting hit with the interruptions and burdens of life. Would you agree ladies?
It’s ingrained in us and there is nothing wrong with that, however, if we are not showing up and nurturing ourselves, how can we possibly be present and engaged in the many other areas of our life?
We just aren’t.
Let me disclose this, I do not have children. Yet, I understand that having children and raising children add an entirely different amount of pressure to our lives that we currently spin around in. Something we are not taught in grade school, nor are we given a book on how to raise children, so we wing it by doing the best we can. The juggle is real. Ha Ha
In realizing that my life for so long revolved around this concept, and because it’s come up more recently, I wanted to share with you what I think about this topic, and how to stray away from it.
Here are some tips that I’ve embraced…
Stay in the present moment for AS LONG AS POSSIBLE. The moment you attach your mind to the word busy, your mind goes, spins out of control, and yes in mid-sentence with a colleague, friend, child or partner and you fall back into your to-do list, and things you have yet to accomplish today or in this life. Extra tidbit – if you find yourself conversing with someone and they ask you how you are, take 1 breath and deepen in to how you’re feeling in that moment, and say it. Please don’t fear mentioning any emotion, in fact it sparks relatability and further conversation is you answer “overwhelmed”.
Step into your inner consciousness (awareness). This helped me immensely as I converse with people throughout my day. I stop myself in my tracks when I find myself saying when asked “How are you Amanda” and I reply, “I am doing good, how are you”. However, in that moment, I am too busy focused on my feeling, I have no capacity to understand theirs, so I take a moment. I have retracted my response and said, “I am really glad you asked, I am actually okay today” and that can sometimes open dialogue and open our souls up to being vulnerable… which is a beautiful state in itself.
Stop trying to beat the rate race and keep up with the Jones’. Look, I am going to just come right out and say it, you’re going to lose. It is not a competition, please stop competing with the world around you, you’ll only fail yourself and then the cycle will continue. Focus on what you can control, which is yourself, your feelings and emotions by showing up in your power every day. Life is not a competition or a race, it is a journey with a beautiful, unknown destiny.
Wouldn’t it be magical living in that day after day instead of trying to control the outcome of every single situation? Reason being, we don’t know the outcomes, so why fight it? That’s what really makes us busy, in our minds and hearts is trying to plan our entire life and have it all figured out along the way.
Just BE my darling; sit, relax, tune in, breath and trust me, it’s better over here and much more peaceful.
Sending love & hugs,